Does My 'Mommy Makeover' Make Me Less of a Feminist?
I never considered cosmetic surgery-- and then I did.
I always loved my body, even after having my two kids. As a raging feminist, I felt proud of my C-sections scars and the additional curves that came with motherhood. While it was definitely harder to lose the weight after the birth of my second daughter in 2017, I still found it easy to embrace my new body. After all, I was a mom now. Why would I want to look like my twenty-year-old self, right?
But that was all pre-COVID. In early spring of 2020 as America went into lockdown, I went into my fridge. While I am not the only one who found comfort in food while the pandemic took the country hostage, by the time restrictions began easing and we were allowed to leave our houses again, I gained a good twenty pounds. For me, this weight became impossible to lose.
For the first time in 42 years, I hated my body. None of my clothes fit anymore. Even as I appeared on-air less, whenever I was on TV, the additional weight made me feel terribly self-conscious. My already large breasts were now a size 38F. At 5’3 inches, I was tipping just over 161 pounds on the scale. No matter how hard I worked out and changed my eating habits, the weight, like COVID, had no plans on going anywhere anytime soon.
After a good year and a half of feeling like absolute crap, avoiding full-length mirrors, and buying larger and larger clothing to hide behind, I went in for a “Mommy Makeover” consultation that to no one’s surprise, led to actually scheduling the procedure.
What is a “Mommy Makeover?” Pretty much just what it sounds like. “Mommy Makeover” is a procedure, or group of procedures, aimed at restoring a woman's body to its pre-baby days. The surgery is not a standard, one-for-all but a “customized treatment plan” including breast augmentation, tummy tuck, and liposuction. The makeover yields extremely high satisfaction results and data finds that 95% of patients report the surgery as “worth having.”
In fact, plastic surgery in general is on the rise. Experts state that changing trends are part of a global surge in “aesthetic medicine” which saw over 30 million surgical and non-surgical procedures carried out in 2021, a 19.3% increase from 2020. The data, published as part of the International Society of Aesthetic Plastic Surgery’s (ISAPS) latest annual survey, suggests that the cosmetic surgery industry not only recovered from two consecutive years of COVID-related decline but grew “far beyond pre-pandemic levels.”
However, sitting in the doctor’s office before my surgery, I felt nothing but shame. I felt like a fraud who was taking the easy way out and worse, I felt I like a “fake” feminist. How could I devote my entire career to empowering women and then go to a male doctor to help me achieve patriarchal beauty norms?
I was also terrified of the message I was sending to my two young daughters. Between my initial consultation and the surgery date, I postponed going under the knife three times and even thought about calling the whole thing off. In the end, I went through with it because feeling bad about myself and my body was just not how I wanted to live. I’ve always had the motto that if you don’t like a situation, get out of it.
My massive breast reduction and tummy tuck started at 7:30am and ended at 2pm. The recovery period was brutal and incredibly painful. It took a good six weeks during which I had to wear a compression garment the entire time. I hired help because I needed assistance with walking, eating, showering, going to the bathroom, changing clothes…everything. I also had two vaginal drains which were excruciating.
But three months later, here I am. I feel like I’ve been given a second chance at a healthier life. Yes, plastic surgery may have helped remove the pounds I gained but it won’t keep the weight off. I now work out regularly and even joined Weight Watchers to help me make healthy food and exercise choices daily. These are two things I never invested in pre-surgery.
The best part of this experience is that I truly feel GREAT. I can wear clothes boldly again! I have such a renewed sense of self-confidence. And I no longer worry about what kind of message I am giving my daughters because what is better than seeing their mom feel good and not loathe in self-pity? The other day, my eldest commented that my posture improved post-surgery. I told her, “Yes, because I am no longer embarrassed by my massive breasts.”
While it may sound shallow to be advocating plastic surgery as the world burns and the average American family struggles to buy basic groceries, if you have the means, I highly recommend the “Mommy Makeover.”
Because life is too short to feel shitty about yourself— physically and mentally.
I’m so proud of you for writing such a brave and vulnerable piece (but I’ve certainly come to expect that from you!). I think part of being a feminist is feeling empowered as a woman to do what makes YOU feel good, and not what others say should make you feel good. Good for you for doing just that!
Are you considering getting a Mommy Makeover? What are your thoughts on feminism and plastic surgery?